This guest post is by Roozbeh, a waiting adoptive parent.
My wife and I first decided to adopt 10 years ago and officially started the adoption process five years later. Over the years we have received many comments and questions about our decision.
Informing and educating others about adoption is an ongoing process and we’ve never given up.
But we’ve learned to keep our expectations in check. Like many complicated topics, there are a lot of nuances to adoption and understanding them all is no easy task.
I would say that most of the insensitive or outright rude questions and comments we get comes down to a lack of knowledge and understanding.
I realize that adoption isn’t the right choice for everyone, and that’s fine. What I didn’t know, however, was that even talking about it can be challenging.
As a result, when it comes to discussing our journey with others my wife and I are more reserved than we were when we started the process—not because we’re afraid of openness, but rather because we want to avoid awkward and disturbing conversations.
Many of the adoption questions and comments we get are innocent—triggered by curiosity or an honest concern.
Still, whenever a new person raises the topic, we find ourselves gauging the individual and the situation before deciding what to say.
Below are some actual questions and comments we’ve received while we’ve been waiting to adopt, and our reactions to them. Read More
When it comes to creating a family through open adoption, how much networking is too much?
If you’re a waiting parent, the answer is simple: There’s no such thing as too much networking.
After all, the more you do, the more of a chance you have of getting yourself out there and eventually connecting with expectant parents.
How this translates into action varies from one waiting parent to another.
This guest post is by Barb, a waiting adoptive mother.
The adoption journey can be a roller coaster ride. It has its ups and downs, good times and bad.
It’s important to surround yourself with people who support you and encourage you.
Too often, though, even well-meaning people will say the wrong things.
Sometimes, if you don’t know what to say, it’s better not to say anything.
My husband and I have been waiting to adopt for more than a year and-a-half and I’m pretty sure we have heard it all.
Here are eight things I wish people wouldn’t say to hopeful adoptive parents. Read More
This guest post is by Andrea Nagle, an adoptive mother.
In October of 2014, after waiting a year-and-a-half, my husband and I adopted our beautiful little girl Olivia.
Her birthparents picked us the night we met them. They were young, hip kids and individual thinkers.
They said they liked that our adoption profile was interesting and had personality.
I had included things like our musical tastes which seemed to be a bit of a selling point for them as they liked some of the same types of music.
They also liked that we hadn’t tried to come off as perfectly polished, conservative, church-going people. To use their words, they weren’t looking for beige.
We really believed that being ourselves was important in attracting a couple that we could relate to, and vice versa. And so it was, in the end!
I was lucky enough to accompany Olivia birthmother during her final few doctor appointments and to be present in the birthing room when she delivered!
Together with her birth parents, we named our new baby Olivia Harlow.