Next to placing your baby for adoption, choosing adoptive parents is probably the hardest decision you’ll have to make.
But thinking about what you’re looking for remove a lot of the stress and make the process a whole lot easier.
As an expectant mother who’s considering open adoption, you have the ability to choose the parents for your baby.
Depending on your province’s adoption laws and your own comfort level, you can contact them directly yourself or do it through an intermediary, be it an adoption worker, social worker, lawyer, parent or friend.
Whereas in the past, the only way expectant mothers could find adoptive parents was to go through an agency, today there are many options:
- social media
- an adoption profile service
- a newspaper advertisement
- word of mouth.
Many expectants find this part of the process difficult and confusing. First, because of the sheer number of parents who are interested in adopting.
And second, in knowing whether they’re choosing the right couple. Or at least the couple that’s right for them.
They worry that they won’t find adoptive parents that will love their child as much as they do. Or they worry that their child will be harmed or abused.
Rest assured: To be eligible to adopt, couples and single applicant need to go through a rigorous screening process called a home study that includes a police checks, medical exam, financial review, interviews and references.
Although you can begin looking for — and choosing — parents for your baby at any stage of your pregnancy, the adoption itself can’t take place until after you’ve given birth.
Many expectant parents reach out to adoptive parents before the birth. They say choosing a family helped make their adoption plan more real and put their mind at rest since it allowed them to know the adoptive parents and feel confident that their child would be cared for and loved.
Others, however, wait until after the birth to select parents either because they’re unsure about whether they’ll go through with their plan and/or because they don’t want any added complications if they have a change in heart.
As an expectant mother you are entitled to change your mind any time before the birth. You also have the option to change your mind after the birth for a limited amount of time. How much time will depend on the laws where you live.