The Hardest Part About Placing A Baby For Adoption

A little while ago I wrote a piece called The Hardest Part About Being A Waiting Adoptive Parent.

It listed some of the challenges that hopeful parents face on the path to building a family through adoption, and many of the points were drawn from my own experiences when we were waiting.

As an adoptive parent, I’ve never placed a baby for adoption so I can’t pretend to know what it’s like.

However, I do know from the birthparents I’ve met or interviewed over the past 17+ years that expectant parents face their own unique set of challenges in their journey through adoption.

Here are some of those challenges, in no particular order, based on our discussions.

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3 Reasons Expectant Parents Aren’t Reading Your Online Adoption Profile

You’ve written your adoption profile, posted it online, and now you’re waiting for expectant parents to contact you.

But no one is reaching out.

You check your cell phone. Maybe the ringer’s turned off.

You take a look at your email. Perhaps a reply got stuck in your Junk folder.

Nope, everything is working. Everything that is, except your profile online.

So, what gives?

Posting your profile or “Dear Birthmother” letter on the web can sometimes feel like shouting in a crowd. No matter how hard you shout, nobody is paying attention.

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10 Surprising Facts About “Dear Birthmother” Letters

“Dear Birthmother” letters have been around for decades. For hopeful adoptive parents, they are the go-to marketing tool to connect with expectant parents who are considering adoption for their baby.

But even though a “Dear Birthmother” letter is a great way to share details about your life and your hopes and dreams for the future, there are many misconceptions surrounding the people who will ultimately read it and what to put inside it.

Here are 10 surprising facts about “Dear Birthmother” letters you may not know that could help you increase your chances of creating a connection. Continue reading

Dear Adoption Social Worker, We’re Breaking Up With You

Dear Adoption Social Worker,

We hope you’re well.

There’s something we’ve been meaning to tell you for a while now: We’re breaking up with you.

Our relationship isn’t working.

You don’t call. You don’t write. What kind of relationship is that?

We were hoping to tell you in person. But since you’re not returning our calls, this note will have to suffice.

If you’re wondering whether there’s another woman in the picture—another social worker, for instance—the answer is no.

We’re just not feeling the love any more.

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