5 Top Reasons An Expecting Mother Chooses Open Adoption For Her Baby

If you’re expecting as a result of an unplanned pregnancy and looking at open adoption for your baby, you’re likely wrestling with a lot of questions.

And one that may come up again and again is simply, “why?”

Why adoption? Why look for adoptive parents for your baby?

Is it the right thing to do? Why do other women choose adoption for their child? How do your reasons stack up against theirs?

These are all good questions. Problem is, there are no simple answers.

For one thing, no two adoption stories alike.

Although there may be similarities between your story and someone else’s, at the end of the day placing  a baby for adoption is a personal choice that each woman must make on her own.

Many people won’t understand your decision and will automatically assume that you’re “giving up” or “giving away” your baby because you don’t care for him.

Nothing could be further from the truth. Most birthmothers today make their decision out of love.

They choose open adoption because they’ve decided to put their child’s interests before their own.

Some people will eventually get it. Other’s won’t. Continue reading

7 Things No One Told Me Would Happen After We Created Our Adoption Profile

Creating an adoption profile is one of the least fun steps in the private domestic adoption process. And that’s putting it mildly.

Most waiting parents would sooner have root canal than sit down and start theirs.

But regardless of what you think of adoption profiles, there’s no questioning their importance.

Next to word of mouth, they are the most important outreach tool in your networking arsenal—a potential game changer when it comes to reaching out and connecting with an expectant mother considering adoption.

But putting one together is far from easy. From deciding what to write about to selecting your photos, creating a profile requires a lot of time and effort.

After we completed ours, it felt like a huge burden had been lifted from our shoulders. Little did I know that it was just the beginning of a new journey with a new set of challenges.

Here are 7 things nobody told me would happen after we created our adoption profile. This list is too late for us, but hopefully it will save you trouble with yours.  Continue reading

Choosing Adoption For My Baby: Am I Doing It for the Right Reasons?

Choosing an adoptive family for your baby is a key part of the open adoption placement process.

But as you go through the profiles of adoptive families, one question that may be nagging at you is, am I doing this for the right reason?

Placing a baby for adoption is a personal choice, one that only you can make.

Even the most confident expectant mothers struggle with it and undergo periods of intense soul-searching in the weeks and days leading up to placement.

That’s perfectly normal. For most expectant moms, adoption is unchartered territory. Nobody grows up dreaming of placing their baby after an unplanned pregnancy.

As a result, your decision could stir up all kinds of surprising and conflicting emotions.

But if your doubts go deeper than that, they could point to a bigger issue at hand. Continue reading

What Will Help Me Get Chosen By A Birthmother?

One of the great things about adopting a baby through open adoption is that you get to play an active role in building your family.

Unlike other adoption routes where you have limited or no control over the outcome, in open adoption you not only have the ability to find and meet the family you hope to adopt from, but the way you go about doing it can also potentially shorten your wait time.

Finding an open adoption match doesn’t mean taking a number and then waiting in line until your turn to come up. It involves reaching out and connecting directly with the birthmother of your future child.

Which brings us to the question that all adopting parents eventually come to ask themselves (if not others): “What will help me get chosen by a birthmother? Is there anything I can do to speed up the time it takes to find a match? If I haven’t found a match thus far, does that mean that I’ll never find a match?

Getting picked by a birthmother–or, more accurately, a woman considering adoption for her baby– isn’t an exact science. Continue reading