What To Expect When You’re Waiting For An Adoption Match

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This guest post is by Kristen, a waiting adoptive parent.

I click on my email inbox. Yet again it’s empty. Or, as is more often the case, spam.

The type of spam that advertises sales from a website I may have clicked on once, or someone trying to sell me medications not even suited to my particular gender.

I scowl, delete it all and distract myself with checking over our baby essentials list.

I’ve fallen into a routine of checking my email no less than 10 times a day (okay, maybe more like every hour or so, but who’s counting?).

I check our blog and Facebook page to see if anyone has checked us out from our Canada Adopts! profile. I wash the curtains and vacuum the carpet in what will be the nursery, in case of a last minute placement.

When my phone rings I pounce on it like a cheetah, just in case it’s our agency. Continue reading

Creating An Adoption Plan For Your Baby? 3 Questions To Ask Yourself First

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If you’re unexpectedly pregnant and looking at your options, you may be considering adoption.

But how much do you really know about it?

For most women with an unplanned pregnancy, adoption means “giving up” your baby and never seeing him again. “I could never do that,” they’ll say.

The good news is, you don’t have to. Adoption has changed. Today, in open adoption, women don’t “give up” their baby. They make a plan — one that is tailored to their individual needs and created out of love for their child.

As an expectant mother, you can be as involved as you want to be in putting your plan together. That includes everything from selecting parents for your baby to naming him to creating a hospital plan.

And you can also be a part of your child’s life after placement.

But like any life-changing decision, adoption is complicated and can be overwhelming, especially in the early stages if you’re new to it.

There are lots of things you need to get your head around: laws, regulations, requirements. Plus, lots of emotional stuff to balance.

No doubt you’ll have lots of questions for others as you move forward with your plan. Here are three to ask yourself first. Continue reading

21 Things To Write About In Your Adoption Profile When You Have No Idea What To Write

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Imagine that the only thing keeping you from becoming a parent is writing your adoption profile.

Sounds pretty simple. Just sit down and start writing it, right?

But that’s when things get complicated.

For starters, you don’t know anything about the expectant mother you’re writing to — who she is or what she’s looking for.

You could make assumptions and write about what you think she’s looking for. But that won’t get you very far.

You could be right. But more often than not, you’ll likely be wrong.

So what do you do?

The only thing you can do: Just be yourself and write about the things you would want to know if you were in her shoes.

Here are some ideas to get you started. Continue reading

An Expectant Mother Has Chosen You To Adopt Her Baby. Now What?

 

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Being chosen by an expectant mother to adopt her baby is an unforgettable event. Once it happens, it’s hard to think about anything else.

You replay the moment in your mind again and again (and again!). You fixate on the delivery date until it’s permanently ingrained in your head. And you start making plans for the future.

But no sooner do you think “I can’t believe this is happening. I’m finally going to be a parent!” than a new set of fears rears its head: “What if I’m just dreaming? What happens if the match doesn’t work out?”

With so many mixed emotions, it’s hard to stay grounded and not feel like a basket case.

By all means, soak up the moment and all of the excitement surrounding it. You’ve earned it.

But keep in mind that you haven’t reached the end of your journey. In many ways, it’s just beginning. There are still a million things you need to do — and, as you’ll see, none of them is easy or straightforward. Continue reading

Why Won’t Alberta Let Us Post Our Adoption Profile Online?

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This guest post is by Valerie Bielenda, a hopeful adoptive parent.

My husband and I are registered through a private agency here in Alberta and we’ve been on the wait list for almost three years now. I sigh loudly every time I think about it.

We tried naturally to build our family for a long time too, but it just wasn’t meant to be for us. Realistically we could have had a 4- 5 year-old by now. 

When we first registered at our adoption agency, the average wait time was two years because they had quite a few placements in 2012-2013.

Then in 2014 it turned out to be a really quiet year. A baby boom was happening — but not for adoptive parents. I won’t lie, we’re frustrated and we can’t be mad at the agency, it is what it is. Continue reading